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28 December 1920

28 December 1920

Villa Isola Bella, Menton, France

When I stuck the small drawing to the side of the mirror frame I realised that the seal - the mark - the cachet rouge - had been set on the room. It had then become the room of those two - and not her room any more. It is not that the room was dead before, but how it has gained in life! Whence has come the tiny bouquet of tangerine fruits, the paste pot on the writing table, the fowl's feather stuck in Ribni's hair, the horn spectacles on the chinese embroidery. The ‘order' in which I live is not changed, but enriched - in some strange way it is enlarged.
This is en effet just the effect of Jack's mind upon mine. Mysterious fitness of our relationship! And all those things which he does impose on my mind please me so deeply that they seem to be natural to me. It is all part of this feeling that he and I, different beyond the dream of difference, are yet an organic whole. We are, as I said yesterday, the two sides of the medal - separate, distinct, and yet making one. I do not feel that I need another to fulfil my being and yet having Jack I possess something that without him I would lack. In fact we are - apart from everything else - each other's critic in that he ‘sees' me - I see myself reflected as more than I appear and yet not more than I AM and so, I believe, it is with him. So to be together is apart from all else an act of faith in ourselves. [KM Notebooks]