15 October

15 October 1920

Villa Isola Bella Menton, France

My own darling,
I confess it was a bit of a jar yesterday to have no birthday. You know how silly I am about them. Of course I didn't expect to hear from any¬body but you this year as the children are in N.Z. but I waited & waited for the post in my room & then when he did come & the envelope was rather fat it was a terrific relief. I thought youd sent me a handkerchief or praps a han made poem. Oh - it was only enclosures after all. I was very glad to get them of course but all the same. It was a misty old day and nobody said many happy returns but when the telegraph man came I was so relieved I gave him 50 centimes. Then I found you really had forgotten. First time since we've been together - and I did give you a nice one - didn't I with that almond paste and all? I felt so desolé that I sent a wire after that myself. [. . .] This AWFUL photograph L.M. took on the orchard path the day I went lemon stealing. She does seem to be bad at cameras. Does she make me look like that? Im going to see Bouchage today - just to know how much I can do.one cant tell. One is so immensely better & then one has a fit of cough¬ing which - isn't better at all. One hears, out of the depths of it the old wolf howling as loud as ever when one thought he'd been driven off & never would dare to attack again - But one couldn't be as hungry as I am and not be getting better. [. . .] Goodbye, my precious Boge - Tell Wing I bet he didn't remember either. [Letter to J. M. Murry in Collected Letters 1920]