11 November 1922

La Prieuré, Fontainebleau, Avon

Dear Ida
I do not think Lisieux is a good idea. It is too isolated. You need people & interchange of relationships to take you out of yourself. You will only get depressed and dull at the farm, I should think. That is my opinion. Would not the Palace at Montana be better? Or that V.A.D. place at Menton? Or why not write to Jinnie F? [Fullerton] She might have an idea. I think it would be worse than folly to live a lonely life. Surely you know your need of people! Any kind of isolation is only possible for very great strong people.
Why are you so tragic? It does not help. It only hinders you. If you suffer, learn to understand your suffering but don't give way to it. The part of you that lived through me has to die - then you will be born. Get the dying over! But remember you will teach yourself nothing alone on a farm. You are not the type. [
No, it makes no difference to me if you are in Paris or not. . . How I am? I am learning to live. But I have not ‘disappeared'. Later I may go to Paris or London or Berlin or anywhere & we could meet and have a talk. I am far less disappeared than ever I was.
I meant the cheque to be 500. Please cash it and use it.
As for the clothes, later, I shall alter them myself.
But do you see that our relationship was absolutely wrong now? You were identified with me. I prevented you from living at all. Now you have to learn & its terribly hard. [To Ida Baker, 10 November 1922.]